Chapter Four: Earth

Grace felt overwhelmed by a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions as she was made subject to feelings one never experiences in the Maker’s kingdom. She felt the pull of time and gravity, and the worst of all, a fleshly body. She screamed in pain at the feeling of flesh and sin that engulfed her. Why did she feel so wretched, so wicked? There was no going back now. She had left the Maker’s kingdom for good, and along with it the peace and security she had once known. Her spirit struggled to get out of the flesh that encompassed it, but she was trapped like a wild animal in a cage. "This is my destiny," she though. "I will be trapped forever." Her heart told her that it never had to be this way, but as fear’s grip tightened and thoughts of comfort were replaced with anguish and resentment. Soon Grace was beginning to feel hate for what the Master had done to her. "How could He?" she though. "He could have stopped me. He could have pulled me back." As she continued muttering hateful words under her breath Grace realized that she had forgotten something. All she could see was darkness, and she began to remember that a human, the creature she had become, had eyes. Slowly she opened them and found herself walking down a paved road, desolate and alone. She wondered where she was, and where the strange creatures called humans were. "Maybe I’m not on earth," she thought. Suddenly a shadow jumped from behind a tree. Grace jumped, then realized that it was not a human that she saw, but one of her own.

At first glance it appeared to be Insecurity again, but when she took a second look Grace realized that it was a new creature that she had never seen before. In fact, never in her whole life had she given him a thought. But now things were different, and the time was right for Self Denial to introduce himself. "Hello, Grace," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "You know what your heart is telling you, that you’ve made a mistake by coming here, but don’t listen to it. Truth is not in your heart or in believing in something. Truth is what you make it out to be. You can decide what is right and wrong." This idea startled Grace. She had never thought about it before, but with new ideas flying at her as she met each new creature she thought maybe this idea was a good one. "All right," she said, easily falling into his trap. "I decide that coming here was right and that I can do whatever I want." "Very good," scoffed Self Denial. "Now take it even further. You can decide that what you did in Chicago was not a mistake, but was the right decision." Grace took a sharp breath as Self Denial mentioned Chicago. How did he know about that? Well, it doesn’t matter anyway, she thought. I like his ideas. After a long silence Grace asked where she was. "Why, earth of course," he replied. "And I have been sent as your guide. I will show you how this planet works, if you like." Grace agreed to the plan and the two of them began walking side by side down the long, windy, road.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The evil creature Annus was not the only one planning. Back in the Maker’s kingdom a counsel had been called at the Makers abode. All of Grace’s friends, including Hope, Love, Joy, Faith, and Forgiveness, were there along with many other creatures of light. All looked into the gentle, loving eyes of the Maker and waited for him to speak. Finally, he said, "Grace has chosen to leave us." With that a hush fell over the small crowd in the Maker’s living room. "She has gone to earth, relinquishing all claim to me and my kingdom." Quietly, Forgiveness began to sob, her shoulders shaking. No one could understand why Grace had done this terrible thing. The Maker continued, "So far she has listened to Fear, followed Insecurity, and is now walking side by side with Self Denial. We must save her before it is too late. I could do it on my own, but I choose to use her three best friends, Faith, Hope, and Love." The three that were mentioned stood and came forward, their pure white gowns flowing in the breeze and tears streaming down their faces. "Your will be done," they said quietly. The maker, with great sadness in his eyes, told them that they had to go to earth. "It is the only way," he said. The three left the building quietly, heading for the same ornate door grace had past through just hours before. When they stepped through, they were encompassed by a quite different felling than Grace had been. Yes, they could sense time, gravity, and even sin, but they were not subject to it. As servants of the Maker on a mission for him they knew that his love and security would carry them as they searched for their missing friend.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Self Denial and Grace continued on their journey, and soon they came to a small farm. Grace jumped at the sound of a tractor starting and realized that there was a person on it. You cannot imagine the thoughts that went through her mind as she saw the man. It was not her first time to see a human, if you remember her trip to Chicago, but she had seen very few and each time she was fascinated. His long gray beard was full of the soil that he worked with and he wore blue, musty overalls over a shirt that probably used to be white. He appeared to be very concentrated on his work, and the noise of the tractor kept him from noticing the slightest movement, although it would not have mattered anyway, because Grace and Self Denial could not be seen by the humans. They were able watch and observe without being noticed. It is a gift given only to those that are from the kingdoms of light and darkness. Grace was in danger, though, of becoming visible. Even after all her mistakes she was still a member of the Maker’s kingdom but if she became rebellious she could very easily turn gray, and then the humans would be able to see her. Do not mistake my meaning, for there is no middle ground between light and darkness. I speak only of one who is becoming progressively more dark, and one of those progressions is the color gray.

Grace and Self Denial moved on down the road and soon came to a door visible only to them. "Do you care to go to a city?" whispered Self Denial. "Yes," said Grace, "I would very much like to see a lot of humans at one time." "Then step through this door, and we will be there." For a moment Grace was suspicious of Self Denial, and she remembered her other friends back home. But the suspicion lasted only a moment and she stepped through the door, with almost complete trust in Self Denial. When she opened her eyes she was standing in front of a sign that read "Chicago post office." Did we have to come to this city, she wondered. There were so many things here to remind her of her fall. Suddenly, and almost without thinking she repeated the words that Self Denial had planted in her mind a few hours earlier. "I did not make a mistake in Chicago, I made the right choice." With that she felt a stab of guilt but chose to ignore it. She had taken the first step to changing colors, and her complexion took on a slight gray hue, causing Self Denial to smile.

Copyright © 2005 by Jamie Madera. Reproduction is forbidden without permission. Contact me at jamielynne87@yahoo.com.